Don Tillman is a tall, fit, intelligent 39-year-old
associate professor and expert geneticist . . . and he is looking for a wife. He
has exactly two friends: Gene, who is on a mission to sleep with a woman from
every country in the world (he has a wall map; the wall map has pins), and his wife Claudia,
who is not entirely pleased with Gene's enthusiastic pursuit of this lofty goal.
Social interactions are not Don's strong suit. He regularly
misjudges the situation and almost always says or does the wrong thing. But he throws himself fearlessly into whatever he thinks the situations calls for, and we love him for that.
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| “I took her in the standard jive hold that I had practised on the skeleton..." |
He eats according to a Standardized Meal Plan (the same seven meals every week) and
follows a strict schedule, and between work and practicing aikido and cleaning the
bathroom he doesn’t have much time to meet women. Claudia sets him up, but
despite Don’s enthusiasm (or because of it), the dates don't go well.
Don just can’t make himself care about the same things other people care about.
“In evaluating Elizabeth’s suitability as a potential partner—someone to provide intellectual stimulation, to share activities with, perhaps even to breed with—Claudia’s first concern was my reaction to her choice of glasses frames. . . . This is the world I have to live in.”
So he decides to take matters into his own hands and designs
a no-nonsense compatibility questionnaire that will quickly eliminate
unsuitable matches and reveal the woman who should logically be his wife—the
one who answers every question exactly right. SCIENCE.
But then Rosie, a free-spirited "barmaid" who defies every item on The Wife
Project questionnaire, walks into Don’s office.
Rosie's arrival sets in motion a series of events that revolve around the search for her unknown biological father, a task for which Don is unusually qualified. Needless to say, she completely upsets his schedule of activities . . . and also deepens his relationship with alcohol.
As far as my personal commentary goes, let me first say that I wasted a good portion of this book picturing Don as Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory when I should have been picturing Cary Grant (the author said so, but then he hid it all the way back in the acknowledgments like an ass). Never miss an opportunity to picture Cary Grant, is what I say.
As far as my personal commentary goes, let me first say that I wasted a good portion of this book picturing Don as Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory when I should have been picturing Cary Grant (the author said so, but then he hid it all the way back in the acknowledgments like an ass). Never miss an opportunity to picture Cary Grant, is what I say.
But the Sheldon connection is a natural one, because Don’s
voice as he narrates could be that of a highly intelligent space alien
trying to master the art of natural human behavior. And his missteps and misconceptions in this
area are the main source of humor in the book.
“I realized that I had behaved in stereotypical male fashion, drinking beer in a bar, watching television, and talking about sports. It is generally known that women have a negative attitude to such behavior. I asked Rosie if I had offended her.”
Thanks to Emily, from As the Crowe Flies and Reads, for being
the first domino in what is sure to be a long line of recommendations for this book.
