Tuesday, March 6, 2012

An open letter to my friends on the Interwebs

Dear friends far and wide with whom I communicate virtually:

Tomorrow, I will be careening through the atmosphere in a metal tube on my way to Florida. There I will remain for 2 weeks.

My best friend has been growing a human, and he is about to emerge victorious from her womb (too graphic?). My duties during these 2 weeks will include the following:

1. Telling her she's pretty (this one is easy because she's quite pretty, indeed)
2. Bringing her burritos in the middle of the night
3. Telling her husband he's going to be fine
4. Chasing people away when she's too tired for visitors
5. Holding the baby and occasionally whispering in his ear, "You're really MY baby . . . but these people will take wonderful care of you"
6. Maintaining a cheery disposition


The reason I'm telling you all this is that I'm not sure how much of my time these duties will consume, which means I may not be as present online as I generally am. And if I DO by some chance snag a little computer time, I may be so exhausted from my best friend duties that I can't write a complete sentence.


I simply CAN'T risk making a typo. You understand.

Think of me often. I will be thinking of you and the glorious day when I shall return to the warmth of your virtual embrace (March 20 . . . mark it in your calendars).

I remain faithfully yours.

8 comments:

  1. GASP. Noooooooooo!!! (but that's very nice of you to do that for your friend) But noooooooooooo!

    CHECK IN WHEN YOU CAN TWO WEEKS IS NOT COOL

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  2. Wow congrats for your friend and also, aren't you a super nice friend! You will be missed here.

    So, are you gone until May 20 or March? cos if it's May, I don't think Alice will be able to stand it

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    Replies
    1. HOW am I always getting March and May confused? I'm a grown woman, and I can't get the order of the months straight. It's embarrassing. I'll be back in the world MARCH 20. ; )

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  3. THIS LAST PART IS ACCURATE

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  4. I could have sworn I replied to this comment yesterday...but I don't see my brilliant response ANYWHERE now. The injustice! But it's MARCH 20. March, May...who can tell the difference?

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  5. You are a lovely friend! But I shall miss you! *hug*

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  6. So I'm way behind on blog reading, and I'm using classtime today to catch up. Just thought you should know that duty #5 made me literally snort. Out loud. In my Employment Law class. *kudos*

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  7. I approve of reading blogs in class. I think that's a wise use of your time.

    I've been away from baby for about 2 weeks, but I'm pretty sure I got to him on the "I am your real mother" front. I intend to revisit the matter when he starts talking.

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